Michael Berkowitz

The Socratic School of Hyphen Counting

for Brad Rose


It’s all about quantity. Taking the 100-yard view, every academy of a certain prestige should have a football team. But as we pride ourselves on being able to see the forest and the trees, there’s nowhere to build a stadium. Of course, it is also all about quality. That cute, blonde safety inspector would have shut us down a long time ago for all these double -edged swords if she wasn’t an alumna. What I’m trying to say, your Honor, is that I do have a philosophy, and a handful of beliefs, but no convictions.