How to Get Ahead in Poetry
Buy a Hummer. Use for
tax credit except don’t pay
taxes. Remove wheels.
Buy welding torch (unless
already available). Melt
wheels to slag; use tires
for potato planter. Get
a horse. Attach horse to
front of Hummer. Buy
box of sugar cubes. Put
in gas tank. There you go.
F . J . B e r g m a n n